This is a *very* good interview defining the term "emotional labor", with Prof. Hochschild, who introduced the term. It speaks to my feeling that the term is applied to scenarios it's not suited best for:
"It seems like this is mostly becoming a popular term in feminist conversations. But if we talk about all the unpaid labor women do in the home as “emotional labor,” we’re insinuating that any kind of labor that falls most often to a woman is “emotional.”"
@rixx That makes me think that the groups of people who need to do the most emotional labour are people with anxiety or other mental health problems they have to mask, as well as any minority just because they are more likely to have to "brace themselves" against the emotional effects of being treated unfairy.
for example, women are deemed more "emotional" and if they control and manage their emotions a lot, which they do just as anybody else, they are still seen as "emotional" and so that emo-management is not acknowledged, really.
also marginalized people have to manage their emotions more in normative settings, thats why you feel you can't "just be yourself" in those settings.
@distel @Anke Definitely, there's no question of that (I misunderstood Anke at first). For me it was just helpful to hear some explanation for my feeling that "chores are emotional labor, and men don't do emotional labor, but they should" is a sentiment that's pretty common lately and always struck me as somewhat wrong (and yet, somewhat right).