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Carapesque @verycarapesque@weirder.earth

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Goodnight friends! Hazy & close—sun a vague bright blot bleaching a quarter of the smooth, liquidly grey sky. Ornamental #florespondence in bloom away from home, lush & uncanny.

Staying w/relatives over easter while @verycarapesque took a rare chance for a long circuit visiting rarely seen friends round the country. Travel knocked me out for now, can't quite get a sense of my condition yet.

May we be ready to lend the aid we can today & prepared to gently accept the help we need!

Carapesque boosted

Goodnight friends! Ghostly grey sky returned, glowering over us, featureless & still. Static pin-pricks of tiny raindroplets tap out faint messages on my skin through the new, still-sparse canopies of the birches.

A perverse relief to be sore from chilly, wet weather again rather than from a cold. Much slowed down from my first post-recuperative burst of energy, but slow steady progress is usually best for me in the long term.

May we find fellowship & solidarity w/those who care for us today!

The OA has gone fully bizarre and I love it

Stomach issues / p health Show more

Stomach issues / p health Show more

Stomach issues / p health Show more

Article about emotional intensity - 'the wounds of being 'too much''. I know the idea of a highly sensitive person etc sounds a bit wooey but I don't know, I think I like this characterization. I can certainly relate to it. Feel a bit angry at people who tell me I think too much, that the things I see, worry about & perceive are untrue, and a simpler view of things is 'correct'. Thinking & feeling so much tends to be unhelpful, but isn't necessarily untrue.

psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/li

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Goodnight friends! A lovely morning this time that slowly faded & lost its radiance as cloud cover darkened. The sky was still alive & mobile though, full of gaps & portals, & there were long slow minutes of green clarity as sunbeams slid across the garden.

Up early & groggy today, woken by sore sinuses—but I can already feel this cold losing its grip. Clearer head, easier to breathe & talk, was able to draw for an hour or more.

May we feel the instincts of our best selves today & trust them!

Carapesque boosted
Carapesque boosted

Goodnight friends! Early signs of relief from heavy, overbearingly grey skies this afternoon when as I set out walking a brief burst of radiance cast deep, green-glowing shade beneath the trees I was walking by.

I'll ache for it tomorrow, but I couldn't resist the sun luring me further around the lake. Bees basked & groomed themselves among the dry leaf litter, great tits ricocheted like warbling pinballs from tree to tree.

May we have confidence in ourselves & the value of our efforts today!

Carapesque boosted

Tomorrow's my birthday, and today I'm going to an expensive doctor's appointment.

If you want to chip in as a birthday present, it would make my day. Thanks in advance

Paypal.me/kinkymal

patreon.com/maloki

Liberapay.com/maloki

ko-fi.com/maloki

Carapesque boosted

Unexpected visitor. (A pheasant, pecking at the window. I also had a kestrel land about five feet from the bathroom window, but I was bathing at the time.)

Have a cold & feel very grumpy & irritable, don't feel up to anything except sitting in bed reading. Still very happy & relieved to be trying mood stabilizers though. Slow titration so it will be a while before they do anything but knowing I might have a calmer future is good enough!

Carapesque boosted

Goodnight friends! I miss even wild melodrama of stormy blue-grey sky today, instead featureless, exhausting to look at—smooth, flat & faultlessly dull as dirty water. Delicate little nameless hedgerow flowers in #florespondence —having been told or discovered the names of some, they all feel more knowable now.

Waking up sore still, recovering still & finding energy to do little bits of different things.

May we support each other & come closer to receiving the help we all need & deserve today!

Meds, mood stabilizer Show more

The sky has been this featureless impenetrable grey for weeks now, it feels so oppressive & makes it seem like the world is ending

Carapesque boosted

took another pass at drawing in the glitch interface–with the limitations of my skill level as a portraitist, and since I only have a mouse for drawing on compu anyway, it feels somehow easier to really strip down my options & force myself to K.I.S.S.

It's @theauracle ! Sending strength & love💖​

photo ref from this post: playvicious.social/@theauracle

#PVart #CreativeToots #MastoArt #MastoDraw #portrait #GlitchDraw #avatar

Oh also I got these new boots, you just pull 'em on and tighten some string

CBD for mental health? Show more

Carapesque boosted

Goodnight friends! Again a gloomy start, but again a rapid—this time bitterly cold—wind scoured the sky blue.

I happened to chat w/an arboriculturist making a survey of trees on the property, & she told me a lot of useful things about trees. She said we can try our best to choose the right tree to plant in the right place—but an ash can live 1000 yrs, so we'll never live to know if we made the right choice.

May we remember to spend some time today on the acts & people that truly matter to us!